Musings...

I'm honestly too tired right now to write a fuller-length article, but I came home from work wanting to watch a documentary. There's a specific documentary series on Hulu that's captured my attention, and one of those documentary episodes I watched tonight. It was about who *really* wrote the New Testament. There were some things I knew, some things I didn't.

Pop interrupted my watching TV to talk to me about possibly coming to church to hear this one guy give a sermon on the book of Romans, chapter 8. This guy I sorta know well; he's the lawyer who, about ten or so years ago, helped my parents and me deal with this one collection agency who kept calling and harassing us for money when we just didn't have the money they wanted. By that reckoning, I am interested in hearing what he has to say, just because he IS a lawyer, and by virtue of that schooling, clearly has more than enough experience in logic and reason. So it's not like I'd be having to listen to someone like a certain conservative Christian from Canada who has oft-times ignored the rules of respectful epistemological debate and just rudely pressed for his own world view. I refuse to write said Canadian's name, simply because he is the conservative Christian version of Voldemort (downright evil and thinking he's always in the right), but those of you who have watched the recent debates between atheists and conservative Christians likely know to whom I am reluctantly referring.

No, the guy that's going to give a sermon tomorrow would be far more interesting to me, for the sake of pure intellectual exercise, than listening to the likes of He-Who-Should-Not-Debate-At-All. I just wish the sermon didn't have to be part of the worship service--simply because most Sunday services are in the morning--EARLY morning, AND because I feel if I went, I would be giving my dad mixed messages.

I have NO interest in going back to Christianity as it is practiced by most people. My experiences and what I know about myself cannot be stuffed back into the box of un-knowing, just because others might prefer I remain a dumb sheep who follows dogma blindly. What I know about myself cannot be revealed to most people in mainstream religion. As much as I honor Jesus as an Ascended Master, I don't necessarily view Jesus in the same light as other people. I feel more comfortable having conversations with the Divine either in a park, or here in my room, typing on my computer.

I don't know how to express my wider view and spiritual path to most religious types except to place it within the box of Unitarian Universalism, to make it more understandable by others who may not share my path, have the same kind of knowledge I do, etc.

Yet despite my strong distaste for the idea of "returning to church" (an idea that I have a feeling my dad still holds as a possibility that might manifest), that wider view calls me to re-examine the ideas that come from the Bible and think deeper on what some of that stuff applies to how I see the world, etc. I am, for all intents and purposes, a Druid. And a Druid is called to explore and learn from other faith paths, among other things. That sounds a lot like me, really. I am also something of a Buddhist, something of a Taoist, something of a Hindu, and to a greater degree, a New Age hippie type person. My path is very, very eclectic.

And you know something? I like being that way. No, I love being that way. I love having ideas and being curious. I love chewing on food-for-thought, sipping on the philosophical wines on offer, sloshing them around in the mouth of my psyche, detecting this or that set of nuances and then just sitting and contemplating all of it. 

I am honestly more interested in sitting in my own inner temple while sitting by a stream, rather than perching my tail-feathers in a church pew. If I choose to be around people in a ritual-type setting, I'd rather be in a circle of fellow Druids and Wiccans honoring BOTH the Divine Feminine as well as the Divine Masculine.

Well, it looks like I wrote a somewhat long article anyhow. It seems once I get going, I get going...I must not have been TOO tired...or the words just needed to get out or else I was going to lay in bed for hours with this stuff swirling around my mind. In any case, it is not likely I will go hear this lawyer guy speak. As good as he is, his sermon is only going to be part and parcel of the whole church thing, and again, I really don't want to send my dad mixed messages or encourage whatever falsely conjured hope he has swirling around in his brain just because he and I have had some fairly constructive conversations about some things in recent months. Whatever epistemological and theological explorations I am undertaking, I am doing so because of the philosophical desire for thought-food and the desire for deeper spiritual understanding about myself, which can be acquired without regular church attendance, I feel.

Anyway...it's off to bed with me. Lots to do!!!!

Peace,
Kat ^.^